Oh, the joy and agita of anticipation.
In 13 days, I will meet someone face-to-face who I know intimately but have never met.
What started out about 20 years ago as a ministry of writing to encourage someone in prison, has progressed over the years to a friendship and taking up a cause. All through correspondence and recent phone conversations.
As of late, in anticipation of actually meeting for the first time, we banter back and forth about the mishaps that could occur due to being nervous. We have had some hearty laughs about it all!
But, the agita remains. And will on that day in particular, I'm sure.
I question God's timing in all this. I flew down to meet him two and a half years ago (before my life imploded), but because of computer glitches, the state of Virginia would not allow me to visit.
Now, after all my shocks and dealing with the devastation in the wake of Joe's secrets, his plots and plans to destroy me, and causing me to lose my home, my car, family and friends. NOW my Father asks me to go and meet someone for the first time? Holy agita, Batman!
NOW, LORD? Really???
My self esteem has been on a slow upswing for a bit now (thank You, LORD!), but it is nowhere near where it should be. So, NOW, You want me to go, LORD? UGH. A G I T A ! (For you non-Italians, "agita" is an Italian word for a nervous stomach.)
So, I will dig my heels in and start changing my "self talk". I will cast down the vain imaginations that exalt itself against the Promises of God. I will start speaking aloud positive confessions over myself. And It will be an awesome meet-and-greet! With NO mishaps! And I will share with you all when I get home. God is going to do some awesome things! (I'm praying that I may even have the opportunity to meet Alex or Thomas who shared Christmas Eve with me.)
I need to think about my Father so much so, that I no longer think about Diane. I can do this! Yes, I can! Because the Spirit of The Holy God is in me! (Dan. 4:18b)
Oh, the joy and agita of anticipation!
Because of Him and Unto Him,